MR. WRONG

There's always drunks at the ballpark, but Opening Day is like going to a Football Game, you know?

I got a bellyful of Batman movie, and popcorn, and a large soda!

Do you even have a clock? Don’t you just look at your phone? Your microwave oven, maybe?

Do you know and/or remember what “checks” are?

Meanwhile, ha! I beat you, Apple! I think!

Meanwhile, whose Summer is it? All I can think is: Summer of Sam, that was an Ownership of a Summer, you could look it up!

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The Man wants Control. The Man wants you to Obey. The Man wants theirs first, dig? The Man is not your friend, and not your fam! The Man!

Anyway, don’t go to Mars, seriously, I heard there’s this seasonal methane release on Mars that the Scientists have observed.

Slice my ham, stop fooling around!

EVERY TIME I chop onions (I am not good at it) I remember that movie about Julia Child where she enrolled in the famous Cordon Bleu, and there was a lab where the baby Bleus hadda learn how to chop the onions, because the onion is a building block of gastronomy or something. Your whole […]

I know that right now is not really a time when lots of people should be getting together to watch the Big Game, or even a little game.

Personally, I do not want to eat a Groundhog.